Am I good enough?

Don't we all wonder that?  Apparently I am lucky enough to live in a county where I can be judged and then told whether or not I am, in fact, "good enough".

Tuesday I was given the honor of being reviewed by the “Professional Standards Committee”

What that is, isn’t made exactly clear, except that it is apparently the group of people that get to judge whether or not parents are good enough to be volunteers at the school. 

I was given a perfunctory phone call in which I was told the committee was reviewing my application, but I do not think they were going to tell me I had to be there if I hadn’t asked.

There is no link for the committee on the county website. There is no listing under staff for this department, a posting of their policies, or even a mission statement.  And why I was not granted the ability to speak to them LAST year when I begged the dividend program members, the school board, the superintendent, and everyone I was redirected to in between for appeal or review? 

The policy currently posted on the website (which was NOT posted last year, in case you were wondering) is the same policy they supposedly followed last year.  I can’t be sure since that policy was not posted last year but IF that is the case and the policy is unchanged, then where was my Professional Standards Committee Review last year?? 

Surprisingly, I was one of three women there. One was applying to be a teacher and one to be a dividend.

It was mentioned before the review that all decisions by the committee were final. Yeah, I don’t think so.  When they tell me no, that is just the beginning of the plans I have been waiting all summer to set into motion. Not an end, by a long shot.  It was cute that they tried though. I laughed in my head.
They started their meeting about 10 minutes late (not very "Professional" if you ask me) and I sat for an additional hour before it was my turn for scrutiny.  I may have been outside the room, and I may not have been given the names of those who judged me, but I have ears and I DID hear a man say "Look at me, I'm a hardened criminal!" In what context it was used, I don't know.  But it was heard.

I brought quite a sizeable stack of recommendation letters (thank you ALL) many of which are from moms in Seminole County and some who had children at my daughter’s school and even in her class last year and some printouts of the various endeavors that I currently do, which include a litter pick up team in my neighborhood, fostering baby animals, raising chickens, painting and interior design, and sewing.  I explained that the only way I could think to show them that I am different than the person who got arrested twelve years ago was to simply show them the things that I spend my time doing. 

And that’s it. I waited all day for a phone call and didn’t get one. I was told I could call the next morning so I did, and got voicemail.  This morning I called again and was told that my application was denied (big surprise there) so now I can move ahead with my plans to address the school board.

I wish I didn’t have to waste time on steps that I already know the outcome of. Got to love bureaucracy.